By John Doney / Owl's Ghetto Times
Los Angeles, California - A 20-something year-old Burbank man was found storming around the living room of his apartment by his long time girlfriend on Friday afternoon. Jeremy Hernandez, a part time graphic designer and real estate agent, became frustrated when he came home after work and logged onto Facebook, only to discover that nobody had commented on his most recent status update. Hernandez’s girlfriend, Morgan Jones, described Hernandez as being inconsolable and in near-hysterics.
Jones had just come home from her job as a receptionist at a dentist’s office to discover an irate Hernandez marching around the living room of their shared apartment, muttering obscenities, and at one point even shaking his hands over his head
According to Jones, the only complete sentence uttered by Hernandez during his tirade was “I can’t fucking believe nobody commented on my status update.”
“I can’t fucking believe nobody commented on my status update, let alone ‘liked’ it. Not a single one of my 847 friends. I usually never come up with anything good, but this time I came up with something totally clever and original, and no one said a God damned thing. Unbelievable,” said Hernandez about the situation.
The status update posted by Hernandez at 7:40 AM on Friday read:
“This girl I saw working on her laptop at Starbucks looked as lonely as the swear jar at Donnie Osmond’s house.”
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